Friday, February 24, 2012

I miss my hair badly!

"So, are you bald now?" common question for me whenever I see my friends nowadays.

Well, as informed and as expectedly, the hairs began to fall badly after 2-3 weeks from the first chemo.

Before that, the hairs were already start falling specially after shower and morning wake up. Seeing the floor and pillow with hairs make me regret that I didn't cut my hair even shorter.

It was few days before Xmas last year when Lily accidentally pulls my hairs and made me realise.. It's time!! Seeing my hairs on her small palm really hurts! I showed it to my mom. Mom asked if there is any pain or not. Nope. No pain. The heart that pain for few seconds! 

The portion pulled by Lily!


Scary!!


On Xmas Day, I get my hubby to cut my hair as short as possible. The hairs are too fragile that simplify hubby's tasks. Pakai tangan saja tarik sambil gunting sikit. The hairs no more short but actually almost bald!! Senang la mau pakai the wig. The truth is I only wore the wig once which was on Xmas day itself. Ntah la.. Mcm tidak selesa juga pakai wig. Anak tudung is much2 better I think but not those tudung la. Am not ready yet. Takkan pula mau buka tu tudung bila sdh ada rambut balik kan. Seru belum sampai. Something macam tu la..

So, here goes my almost-bald head! Kira bald la juga kan..


Plan to totally bald it end of the mth. At least, sama rata kalau tumbuh balik. Kena pula rambut jenis lambat panjang! Aduiii.. bila la ada rambut balik ni?! The hair will only start growing after completed the chemo. Miss them so badly!

Recently, my eyes caught a 50% hair makeover voucher in Cleo and was excited kunun nie before I realise I have no hair for makeover! Poor me!

But pls don't pity me ya.. When I say poor me that doesn't mean like I was thinking negative or what coz I know I am strong and I can go through all this! I never know that I am as strong as myself now coz I am actually a pesimis person!! Perhaps I am just not pesimis as I think I am! Hmmm..

Of coz my children look at me weirdly and they prefer me cover my head at the beginning. We will tell them mommy is not well and they nod. "Mommy, du-du (sakit)" Rayyan repeated. Now, they are used to my new look. *grin*

Btw, I have completed part 1 of the chemo session. 4 cycles every 3 weeks done. Part 2 will start next week. It's a 12 cycles chemo on weekly basis with lesser dosage! Phewww... Am not worry with the total number of cycles. It's just that the weekly poke that I hate. Ngeri juga kena cucuk dekat area dada. Last cycle, the nurse wrongly poked and they have to re-do the poke-process. Aduiiiiiii..... menitik jg tu air mata!

So far, I do not have any major effect besides being bald. Appetite pun ok. Blood count ok. Cuma senang terjangkit flu+cough. Bila terjangkit, it takes 2 weeks to recover. Hmmm... Am not sure bout the cells thingy. So far, doc never review bout the cells. Maybe after completed the chemo?! Will keep u guys updated. Pray for me ya.. ^_^

26 comments:

  1. U r always in our prayer Just.. he he he.. no worry ba, kalau stkat rambut, bulih tumbuh balik kan nanti.. ^_^.v..

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  2. Just u r always in my pray...

    Be strong ya....kalau bald suda pun ok juga bah...just wish u alwys strong ya...

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  3. You are one of the strong person i have encounter ba moi.. Bial suda tumbuh balik rambut ko, kita sam2 pigi buat hair makeover kio and u always in my prayer..=)

    P/S: Pasal mo pakai hijab, sia pun ready lagi walaupun ramai yg selalu sindir2 sia ni..

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  4. Hi Just,

    Honestly speaking, m sad to hear dis but I shud support u dari jauh and put you in my prayer and positive side can bgaya dgn pelbagai wig kan? :)

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  5. Hello dear, i follow ur blog from time to time... u r indeed a strong will person... Bless u...

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  6. Hi Just its ok without hair now pandai tumbuh juga tu nanti. I really admired your strong will and be positive with all what you're goin thru and that's is good to energize positive energy that leads you to a speedy recovery. It reminds me of ma bestfriend dulu pun dia go thru macam ko i mean 'the hair' thing tapi sekarang rambut dia lawa sudah hehe...Will always bring you in ma prayer...

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  7. Honestly speaking, I cried reading your posts not because you're having cancer but you're a strong woman fighting over it. I'll pray for you ;) stay strong^^

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  8. u such a strong lady lah Just. U really an inspiration to ladies out there. Your positive and perseverance attitude lead to a saying that mind controlled everything.. :)

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  9. hope everything will be okey soon sis..

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  10. Just,
    3x sy buka ni blog baru sy dpt habis baca..sebab can't read..saya menangis baca..:(..
    sy nangis sbb tgk ko sgt kuat dan tabah..reli proud of u..
    take care kio..u always in my prayer..

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  11. Nanti tumbuh juga tu semula,hihi

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  12. Although our chemo medication is completely different type and dosage, but i can relate the experience of having to go through the unpleasant moments of needle poking as well. Apa lagi ko punya yg have to go through the chest. I pray that you will sail you next chemo cycles with much ease. Way to go Just!

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  13. Hi Just,

    Everything will be allright, InsyaAllah. After the chemo done and the hair start tumbuh.. kita pi makeover sama2 k. Btw, pakai anak tudung ja bah..Kalau belum sampai seru buat apa jua mau paksa diri kan.

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  14. I hope you are doing fine yah. Cepat2x lah chemo kau habis. You can do it :)

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  15. Take care just...Sa tau..ko lebih kuat menghadapinya..."Indah pada waktunya"

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  16. Saya tahu ko kuat Just. Jgn susah pasal tu rambut, tumbuh juga tu..

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  17. I maybe late to comment here but seriously my mind never stop thinking yr condition. Kalu psal blog kan, your blog came 1st in my mind.

    Oya, kalu rambut ko tumbuh bali, it will be new hair laitu kan. Wah, mcm rambut baby bru tumbuh. :)

    Anyway, is good to see you are ok. I mean you are ok. Mcm besa ko jawab sa dlm sms 'sa ok2 saja' I loike that.

    Bah, jumpa nanti bila balik in May. *hugs*

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  18. Biarpun sya jarang2 blogging suda, tapi selalu sya ingat2 ko tu mcamana suda ko... Will always pray for you. :-) Yang penting kasi complete dulu tu chemo. Take care. :-)

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  19. This post really showed that you're a strong woman and brave enough to share your pain so that others will get inspiration from it!! =) You'll always in our prayer sis.. take care.. God bless you :)

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  20. Thank you all of you for the supports and prayers! nda sabar mau tunggu rambut tumbuh ni! huhuhuhu...

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  21. be strong and get well soon my dear :)

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  22. Hi Just.. Tiapa, rambut bulih tumbuh balik. Mesti yang tumbuh tu lagi bagus-bagus tu kan dari yang sebelum ni :) You're a strong woman and I know you're gonna stay strong until all the chemo thingie is over. You'll always be in my prayer, moi!

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  23. My prayer always with you & your family. Stay strong & get well soonest.

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  24. Ada rambut atau tiada you are still the same person to me...be strong Just. We are here to support you no matter what...

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  25. hey you will be alright! email me! I am sorry you are having to go through this...

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You're 'bout to corner... ;p